On Becoming “Homeless”

Last night, I said goodbye to my childhood home forever. Ever since I began teaching diasporic world literatures, I’ve been toying with the concept of “home.” I asked my students–a diverse bunch from all around the world–how they would define home. In attempts to get them to think more deeply, I told them how IContinue reading “On Becoming “Homeless””

Un-Becoming a People Pleaser

I’ve lived nearly 32 years in service to others. Taught to “do the right thing,” to “be the bigger person,” to do what everyone else had done before me, and to “wait my turn” to live the way I wanted to, you can’t even begin imagine how angry I was–am–when I realized that my innate desire to help others and my chronic aversion to conflict had not only been used for others’ sole benefit but in order to keep me “in my place.”

On Becoming Political

The disorder peculiar to my country (the United States) is its citizens’ inability to care about anything but themselves. I blame this on the Christian principles of “aspir[ing] to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs […] so that you may walk properly before outsiders and be dependent on no one” (1 Thessalonians 4:11-12).Continue reading “On Becoming Political”

On Becoming a Bride, or Everything NOT to Ask Queer Couples Getting Married

The identities of the individuals discussed have been disguised in order to protect their businesses. My then wife-to-be and I were sitting in side-by-side styling chairs at the salon for our trial hair and makeup session for our wedding day. The makeup artist had just introduced herself, and although I had told the salon overContinue reading “On Becoming a Bride, or Everything NOT to Ask Queer Couples Getting Married”

On Becoming the Only Queer in the Family

“It hurt. It hurt like hell. But it didn’t matter, if no one knew.” — Nella Larsen, Passing

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